Connecting in the Digital Age: The Dilemma of Screens in Preadolescence
In today’s digital age, the constant concern about the impact of excessive screen use on the development of our children creates a parental dilemma. The crossroads between allowing them to integrate into the dominant digital culture and resisting what is considered “normal” can generate parenting tensions. This dilemma raises crucial questions about how new technologies affect the skill development and future of our sons and daughters, especially when we introduce mobile into their lives during such a crucial stage as pre-adolescence.
Are we giving in to a trend that could harm the mental and emotional health of our tweens?
Despite the consensus among experts warning us that early exposure to screens and constant access to social networks and video games can be harmful, social pressure often leads us to allow more time in front of screens than desired and to provide mobile devices at an early age (in Spain, according to statistics, most minors own a personal smartphone from the age of 13).
Even if we resist the idea of our children having premature access to screens, denying them possession of a cell phone when it is culturally considered “normal” can intensify pre-existing family conflicts. Monitoring the use of screens can become one more element for the increase of aggressiveness, can generate greater distancing between family members, increase communication problems and lead to emotional exhaustion that endangers the delicate balance of family coexistence.
Looking for a balance between control and preserving a healthy bond.
In this scenario, it is essential to find a balance between maintaining family ties and supervising the use of screens, this being an extremely complicated task. Establishing healthy habits before introducing the cell phone, such as screen-free social interaction, reading, family communication, physical exercise and creative activities, can be essential.
When there are already family conflicts that intensify in pre-adolescence and are exacerbated by controlling screen use, it is important to maintain communication spaces outside of conflict areas. Avoiding screen interruptions during mealtimes, taking advantage of opportunities for non-conflictual communication, engaging in activities that our children enjoy, are strategies to ensure that the family bond persists despite the difficulties that may arise.
When conflicts escalate and we feel we are losing control.
The answer to whether our children should have access to screens has no single solution. Not succumbing to social pressure and educating our children about a balanced use of screens is crucial, but it is also fundamental to prioritize the family bond in difficult and delicate moments in the lives of our daughters and sons. Remember that we are not against what they are, it is not a battle against our pre-adolescent, it is a dialogue that must be sustained within an unbreakable bond.
