Why do I feel this way? A different perspective on anxiety
Restlessness. Fear. A knot in your stomach. Difficulty sleeping. A racing mind.
In therapy, many people come asking if what they’re feeling is “normal,” if they’re “sick,” or if they have “generalized anxiety disorder.” It’s understandable. We live in an age that quickly medicalizes discomfort and suffering.. But here I propose something different: to look for the causes behind anxiety instead of trying to silence it.
Anxiety is not the same as a pathology.
Anxiety is not an illness. It’s not a mistake your body is making, nor is it a sign that you’re failing. It’s a human response to situations that affect us: the uncertainty of the future, the fear of disappointing others, the weight of our own expectations.
Anxiety doesn’t arise because something is wrong “with you,” but because there’s something in your life that needs attention.
How does it manifest?
There isn’t just one way. Anxiety disguises itself:
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As incessant thoughts: “What if…?”, “What if I’m not enough?”, “What if something bad happens?”
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As physical symptoms: muscle tension, palpitations, shortness of breath, digestive problems.
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As behaviors that try to protect us: avoidance, irritability, emotional blocks, isolation, restlessness.
Sometimes we think the important thing is to eliminate the symptoms as soon as possible, but that would be like turning off an alarm without asking why it’s going off.
Anxiety as an uncomfortable signal
Anxiety puts us on alert, mobilizes us, forces us to look. The problem isn’t feeling anxious. The problem arises when we try to run away from it without addressing its cause.
For example:
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If you’re afraid of public speaking, you might avoid job opportunities that could help you grow.
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If you’re afraid of connecting with others, you might isolate yourself, even if you deeply want to share your life with someone.
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If the future worries you, you might numb yourself with work, social media, or alcohol.
In that attempt to protect ourselves, we disconnect from what gives us meaning and what matters to us.. And that’s where the discomfort intensifies and a vicious cycle is created.
What Anxiety Reveals
Anxiety isn’t just biology or dysfunctional thoughts. It’s also—and above all— a way of responding to our relationships with life (friends, family, work). . It affects us when something in our lives challenges us, questions us, or inquires about us, and we don’t quite know how to respond.
What does the other person want from me?
Am I good enough?
What value do I have for the other person?
Anxiety often confronts us with questions that are difficult for us to answer.. Therefore, it’s not about trying to control it (because that would only increase it), but about understanding what it’s trying to tell us so we can work on it.
Anxiety as a compass
Anxiety can be a compass pointing to something important.. Perhaps a silenced desire. Perhaps unresolved pain. Or a need to change course.
The important thing is not to eliminate it, but to question it with curiosity and work on new solutions.
If what you read resonated with you…
Perhaps it’s time to start working on it with professional support.
Marcos Böcker
687454124
